Authenticity vs. Toxicity: Depicting the Past Without Judgment (But Inviting It Anyway)

One of the best professors I had in college once told me: I’m not here to give you all the answers. I’m here to help you ask the right questions. That philosophy stuck with me, and it’s something this book—and this entire series—can aspire to as well.

Because The Wake of Expectations isn’t about handing readers a set of neat conclusions. It’s about presenting moments as they were experienced and trusting the reader to grapple with them.

The Challenge of Writing an Honest Past

There’s a tricky balance when writing about the past—especially when you’re committed to authenticity. It’s easy to clean things up, to make characters more enlightened than they really were, or to slip in a modern perspective that calls out every flaw in real time. But that wouldn’t be honest.

Instead, Wake presents Calvin exactly as he was in the moment—not with the wisdom of hindsight, not with an authorial hand guiding the reader toward an easy moral takeaway. This means sometimes Calvin is frustrating. Sometimes he’s wrong. And sometimes, he’s neither right nor wrong—just navigating life the best way he knows how.

Calvin is not presented as a moral exemplar. Nor does he exist as an object lesson or a cautionary tale. He is a person—a flawed, evolving person. He makes mistakes. He does (or at least says or thinks) things that are selfish, thoughtless, or even cruel at times.

But good people can do bad things. And bad people can do good things. (This exact idea was just presented in the latest episode of Daredevil: Born Again, but it’s been true for as long as stories have been told.) Sometimes you don’t know which one you are.

Inviting Criticism Without Dictating It

Just because Calvin thinks it or says it doesn’t mean he’s right. But it doesn’t mean he’s wrong either. It just means he’s Calvin—the Calvin of that moment.

That’s especially true when it comes to the way Calvin and his friends talk about women and sexuality. At times, their casual objectification goes unquestioned in the moment, just as it often did (and still does) in real life. Whether it’s the way they talk about women’s bodies, measure women by their looks or sexual availability, or make offhand jokes about homosexuality—these moments aren’t flagged with a moral judgment.

But that doesn’t mean the reader isn’t supposed to notice. (Or that the author didn’t notice it either.) If you read those moments and feel uncomfortable, good. That means you’re thinking about it. If you read them through a nostalgic lens, you may better understand the characters’ intentions—though that may come with a lingering blind spot to the impact of their actions. And that’s an important distinction to make.

The Role of Humor: Laughing at the Wrong Things?

The Wake of Expectations does invite you to laugh. And sometimes, you may catch yourself thinking, I shouldn't be laughing at this. But maybe you still will, despite yourself. And maybe that’s worth reflecting on.

Is it actually funny? If so, why do I feel bad about laughing at it? Can I hold two thoughts in my head at the same time—this is wrong, but it’s also funny?

In Raw, Eddie Murphy tells the story of how Bill Cosby chastised him for his use of profanity. He recounts how Richard Pryor told him, "Whatever…makes the people laugh, say that shit." The point being that laughter serves its own purpose, and sometimes we use tools to make people laugh that not everyone will be comfortable with.

But then, what is appropriate? What is fair game? As French comedien Pierre Desporages once said, “We can laugh at everything, but not necessarily with everyone.” When is a joke just a joke and when is it supposed to make you think? When are we laughing with rather than at someone? When are we making a joke about the disconnects that arise when our perceptions differ rather than about how someone else perceives the world? And can the purpose of a joke depend on the audience?

The Wake of Expectations doesn’t answer these questions for you. But it does put you in situations where you’ll have to think about it. Humor, especially dark humor, exists in that uncomfortable space between amusement and critique. It makes us confront the contradictions in what we find funny, and in doing so, it can become a tool for self-awareness.

It’s okay if you laugh. And it’s okay if your laughter makes you uncomfortable. And it’s even better if your discomfort makes you think. That’s what dark humor is supposed to do.

The Book Exists as a Story, First and Foremost

Although these issues of humor and morality are woven throughout Wake, the book does not exist primarily to be a meditation on these themes. It’s not an endorsement of what the characters do or say; it’s not a critique either. It’s a depiction—it exists as a story. A personal story.

One person’s journey.

Calvin’s journey.

The point is, meditations on these themes are part of every personal journey. Everyone, at some point, looks back and wonders:

Did I do the right thing?
Did I hurt people without realizing it?
Was I the bad guy in someone else’s story?

This book isn’t about giving readers those answers. It’s about giving them the space to ask those questions. It invites you to ask, but it doesn’t demand it, and it doesn’t do it for you.

To be clear, my goal is authenticity, not social critique. Take from it what you will. There are layers. If you want to wrestle with the deeper questions, they’re there. But if you’re just here for a story, that’s fine too. You’re welcome to experience it however you choose. My primary concern is that the story is told honestly and earnestly.

Let the Reader Do the Work

A book like The Wake of Expectations doesn’t spoon-feed the reader moral conclusions. It doesn’t engage in a presentist critique. It presents characters, situations, and perspectives as they were experienced (or, more accurately, as we reconstruct them or imagine they would have been experienced during that time, in that moment). Some readers will be frustrated by that. Others will appreciate the honesty. Some will probably feel both.

I honestly hope you like Calvin, I really do. But I don’t expect you’ll like everything about him. The important thing to remember is this: just because Calvin thinks it, doesn’t mean he’s right. He’s just Calvin. And it’s up to the reader to decide what that means.

And if Wake doesn’t give you all the answers—good. It was never supposed to.

Further Viewing

Eddie Murphy (Raw) on Bill Cosby and Richard Pryor:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZlQaE4GDUY

Javier

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